


Ride the Night to the End

by silvertrails



Series: Our Love [20]
Category: The Silmarillion and other histories of Middle-Earth - J. R. R. Tolkien
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-07-19
Updated: 2017-07-19
Packaged: 2018-12-04 01:23:30
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,197
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11544510
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/silvertrails/pseuds/silvertrails
Summary: My entry for the July 2017 challenge: Jut an Old-Fashioned Son. I picked "I want to Spend My Lifetime Loving You", by Tina Arenas and Marc Anthony.The story is set a few days after the Battle of Unnumbered Tears. It's written from Maedhros' POV.





	Ride the Night to the End

**Ride the Night to the End  
** By CC  
July, 2017 

This is an amateur effort and does not intend to infringe on the rights of J.R.R. Tolkien. I make no profit and mean no harm.

This story is set in First Age 472, a few days after the Nirnaeth Arnoediad.

I wrote this for the SWG July 2017 Challenge: Just and Old-Fashioned Love Song. I chose “I Want to Spend My Lifetime Loving You, by Tina Arena and Marc Anthony.

* * *

_Moon so bright night so fine_  
Keep your heart here with mine  
Life's a dream we are dreaming  
Race the moon catch the wind  
Ride the night to the end  
Seize the day stand up for the light 

The night was clear and bright, and the full moon illuminated the fields ahead as if Elven and Edain blood had not been shed not long ago. Maedhros was standing on the northern bank of the Ascar, atop a cliff, looking down at its dark and violent waters. The river came down through the Ered Luin and opened its path through the lands on its journey toward the Gelion. 

The wind was eerily gentle around him.

Almost warm.

It was as if Arda was mocking Maedhros, showing him its beauty when his whole life had lost the one light that had sustained him through the darkness. It was no long ago when he had held Fingon in his arms, stealing a moment just for them in Himring while the world kept crumbling at every pace. The image of Fingon lying on their bed, hair loose, face flushed, and lips parted in offering came to Maedhros’ mind, filling him with pain. He had kissed Fingon deeply, burying his hand in the soft tresses, feeling the heat rising between them. 

Fingon had pulled him closer, and rolled them over on the bed until it was Maedhros who was lying on his back while his lover traced paths of fire over his heated flesh. Maedhros had moaned softly, blindly reaching for Fingon, wishing they could stay like this forever. All Maedhros had wanted from life was to be with Fingon, even when they broke apart because their sires started to argue, to fight, and to distrust each other. Even after Fëanor had unsheathed his sword and pointed it to Fingolfin’s chest…

_I want to spend my lifetime loving you  
If that is all in life I ever do_

They had promised to find a way to stay together, to see each other again somehow when Maedhros and his brothers followed their father to Formenos. They had tried, and almost found their way back, but Morgoth and Ungoliant had ruined that chance. 

Maedhros’ love had never faltered. 

”My love for you never faltered either, Maitimo,” Fingon had said. “All this time all I wanted was to be with you again.”

Maedhros closed his eyes, his heart breaking at the memory of Fingon’s words before they started the journey to Endorë. If he stayed like this, eyes closed while the wind caressed him gently, Maedhros could pretend that Fingon was here with him, that he was safe. Maedhros let himself fall to his knees, tears filling his eyes. If he could just lay down and sleep and never wake up again, just waiting for the moment when Fingon was returned to him… But he was tied by the Oath. He could not rest until it was fulfilled. He could not leave his brothers behind.

They had been so young and naïve back then, their flames so bright, their wish for vengeance over Finwë’s death intermingled with their desire to find a place in Endorë. They had both dreamed of such place, where nobody could separate them again. 

_Heroes rise heroes fall_  
Rise again, win it all  
In your heart, can't you feel the glory?  
Through our joy, through our pain  
We can move worlds again  
Take my hand, dance with me 

Fëanor and his demons, Fingolfin and his stubborn pride, Maedhros’ inability to fully oppose his father, Fingon’s need to make his father proud. Only Finwë had helped them back then, and once he was gone, their lives had fallen prey to the same darkness that killed their grandfather and made enemies of their sires.

In the end, Fëanor had died, fatally wounded by Gothmog, his body turning into ashes as his fiery spirit left it. Fingolfin had died in combat with Morgoth, making Fingon the High King and placing a thicker wall between them, a wall they had climbed whenever the dark forces, and their duties, allowed them to be at peace.

Maedhros still could feel Fingon’s lips on his own, warm at first, almost gentle for a moment, only to become passionate and demanding in the end. He could Fingon’s body leaning against his own, as they both sank to their knees before the fire that warmed Himring’s cold nights. They had danced together between life and death, and now Fingon was gone and Maedhros was alone. 

How was he going to go one now? How was he going to survive this pain?

_I will want nothing else to see me through  
If I can spend my lifetime loving you_

The sound of the river seemed to be calling Maedhros now, all thoughts of the Oath and his brothers forgotten as he allowed himself to be enthralled by the darkness waiting for him. He stood and walked closer to the edge, ignoring the wind that seemed to be pulling his hair and cloak back. Maedhros laughed. Now the wind wanted him alive? Endorë wanted him to live so he could fall deeper into the Doom’s clutches? He took another step forward…

_Though we know we will never come again_  
Where there is love, life begins  
Over and over again  
Save the night, save the day  
Save the love, come what may  
Love is worth everything we pay 

Something stopped him, as if the wind had become sentient and warmer. Maedhros could feel loving whispers in his ears, and when he turned around he saw Fingon, almost transparent, looking at him with fear and love. Maedhros closed his eyes, willing the hallucination to fade away. Was his suffering not enough? 

The wind surrounded him again, and this time he knew it was really Fingon. “I will wait for you, but please have faith. We will meet again.”

A sob shook Maedhros’ frame. “Don’t go, stay with me. Or take me now. I cannot live without you.”

“You can, and I will always be here, in your heart.”

Soft, warm lips kissed his own, and Maedhros held to the all too real form of his cousin. He lost all sense of time and place, all sense of himself. There was light where there was only darkness.

Maglor and Celegorm found him sleeping away from the cliff’s edge, and together they returned to their brothers. There were no questions, and Maedhros did not offer any explanation. He was still in pain, but he felt stronger now, and he was at peace.

One day, Fingon would be back, and they would be together. For now Maedhros had to ride the night to the end.


End file.
